DIY Wedding Flowers, the Series
Disclaimer: I’m writing this as someone who has been involved in countless weddings and thinks eloping might be kinda nice.
My Mennonite community has a rich musical heritage, so for years I was part of a capella groups that sang at the weddings of my friends and distant acquaintances. (“Some saaay looooove, it is a river…). My sisters and I have coordinated ceremonies and receptions, been in charge of fruit displays and errant servers, and have inevitably dropped into our chairs at the end of the day saying, “There’s got to be an easier way to do this”.
Weddings can be incredibly beautiful but also just really, really stressful. Just the other day, we were finishing up our floral install while chatting with the couple who owned the place, and a frantic young lady came looking for help because “the head table won’t be set up in time!” The British indeed are coming. I feel ya, sister. Perhaps it’s because we have this front row seat into the chaos that precedes pretty much every wedding ever that we advocate a simple approach.
As someone who is part of the $72 billion a year wedding industry, writing this is a bit like saying, “Here’s why you shouldn’t buy what I’m selling.” I write from the perspective of one who doesn’t think we should spend more than we can afford to impress people or fulfill a notion of expectation. I took that Dave Ramsey class to heart. If you get nothing else from this series, my main point is this: If you want to (or need to) do things differently, do! Don’t have a bridal party or a reception. Forego the cocktail hour and the fruit table. Get married while you and your guests stand beside a river. This is your permission slip. (Good, that’s all it takes, right?)
On the flip side, weddings ARE and should be a celebration. If you can afford to serve prime rib to honor your guests and mark this life-changing occasion with flowers dripping from every baluster and chandelier… maybe call us about those flowers.
Don’t let the wedding industry sell you a false dream. It wants us to believe the key to a good marriage is getting married in a Patagonian chapel with 12 bridesmaids dressed in peach tulle waltzing down the aisle to the strains of the Wedding March at precisely the right moment and us getting married at juuuust the stroke of sunset before running off to Italy on our honeymoons… Yeah, that’ll set us up for life. I don’t need to tell you that a good marriage takes far more than that.
So, disclaimers aside, tomorrow I will dive into part one. I’m not sure how many parts this series will have yet (it has been simmering for several years), but probably at least three. We’ll talk about why you should hire a florist and how to choose a florist you can trust, and when to consider the DIY route. We’ll also discuss why wedding flowers cost so much and ways that you can cut back to save big time.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. Did you have a big, awesome wedding? Was there a catastrophe? (do tell!) How would you do it differently? What would you keep exactly the same? Go ahead. Change my mind about eloping. 🙂
-LaRonda
Ooohhh. I can’t wait for these! I’m not married but have lots of friends who are and whom I’ve helped get ready for their weddings and my sister just got married on Saturday so of course I’m all ears! 🙂
Well, I’m quite sure you could write this series yourself! 🙂 I’d love to hear the things you’ve learned through your experiences.
So this was the first wedding for my family so as far as family weddings are concerned, I don’t have much experience. But as far as weddings…my opinion is that the more details you think you need to have the more stress there is cuz it’s just that much more stuff to get around. Also, good coordinators and good organization as far as the details that you have to have for a wedding and the extras that you decide to have is KEY to having things go smoothly. My sister was not picky with the majority of her details. She would’ve loved to use all local flowers and was trying for peonies (picked a few wks ago) but they were no good so we ended up ordering flowers. We were pleased with what we got and she doesnt feel like she spent an outrageous amount on flowers although it was enough! But what else can you expect if you want nice flowers? We did them ourselves (having never done wedding flowers before). We had alot of fun with them. We’d set up on Thursday so that was our main project for Friday. We got our own greenery from the roadside and local flower beds. That worked out fine cuz we had allowed time for it. My sister (the bride) commented while we were doing it that if she’d get married again or if her sister’s get married, she’d tell them just to buy their greenery. If it as me, I’m not sure…it would definitely depend on the time of year and time that we have to do things and probably the budget too! It took about half the day on Friday to do 6 bridesmaids bouquets and about 20 medium (my guess on the size) arrangements for centerpieces and then she also had some bottles and bud vases that we put a few stems in. I was pleased with how everything went. We had plenty of flowers which made it lots of fun! When I asked my sister at the end of the day if it looks like what she imagining she said, yes, it’s just what I wanted…lots of flowers!”
Yay for having fun with the flowers… that’s the important part if you’re doing it yourself. No point in stressing, right?
If you want nice flowers, you’ll have to pay for them! 🙂 Couldn’t have said it better myself.
Summer and Fall are the best time to have a foraged greenery plan for weddings, and its always good to go scout them out before hand to make sure you’ll have what you need. I think you’re ready to tackle the next wedding with everything you learned. Go for it!
(And thanks for sending photos! The flowers were beautiful.)
Ooh, fun! I am happily married, and happy with the wedding we had, but I do dream sometimes about how I would have done things differently. And I would simplify more from what I believe was already a simple wedding by today’s standard. It did not occur to me that we could get married without the traditional bridal party, reception, music, etc. For me, most stressful part of wedding planning was arranging the a cappella group to sing throughout the ceremony. We both love professional choral music, but knew that standard was an unrealistic expectation. And recorded music was not an option. If we were redoing our wedding, we would have congregational singing as the sole form of music. We also would feel free to not have a bridal party at all, or to have our families stand as witnesses, or possibly just a close sibling for each of us. Which would eliminate a complicated rehearsal and the need to practice all the filings in and out, as well as deciding a bridal party wardrobe, setting up a head table, scheduling a time for wedding day photos with bridal party, etc. I love my bridal party peeps, but in my case, I would have preferred a more relaxed schedule the week and day of the wedding. I may be in the minority here. It will be interesting to come back and read other comments. 🙂 I went the DIY route with flowers. The bridal party flowers were hand-picked bouquets from a pick-your-own flower farm, and the table arrangements were home-grown in my aunt’s and parents’ backyards. I think would totally do my own flowers again. I had so much fun doing it. My aunt and cousin helped me and it was a special time together.
I love it! Eliminate rehearsals?! Whoever knew that could be possible?! 🙂 Your ideas are awesome and reflect what is important to you… and that is the perfect way to celebrate your day. I love the notion of DIY flowers.
With getting into doing wedding flowers for the past year ( so far it’s been for friends as a favor but I’ve done at least 5 now and scheduled for more!) I am very interested in these blogs!! I’ve been told over and over I should go into the business but then I’m afraid it would not be fun any more. I’ve had my share of stresses…the main ones being flowers not arriving in time and expectations to do more than is possible for one or two people in a day…”oh, ya, I forgot to tell you..can you do an arch yet too?!”
A last minute arch?! Oh, the white hairs. lol The business of flowers is pretty stressful because they are so perishable, but as long as the reward outweighs the stress we’ll keep doing it, right?
Uh-oh… your mama read this, and that eloping business- not an option. 🙁 keeping it simple- definitely! 😉 no bridal party, no rehearsal, and no cake for us, but flowers, yes… and it worked quite well. And someday hopefully I can do a wedding for you. 😉 Also, great writing!
I figured you might have a thing or two to say about the eloping business! 🙂 Don’t worry. Kinda wish I could have been at your wedding 😀 but that wouldn’t have been good, now would it? It sounds perfect.
Oh wait, that wasn’t roses we had, but shiny red apples in wooden bowls. 🙂 Maybe not quite as pretty as your flowers, but still pretty. 🙂
Not married… but have helped with quite a few weddings, some more (ahem) more memorable than others and usually not for the right reasons. 🙂 I voted DIY for flowers (although bridal flowers would be the exception) on your IG poll because I know that (being a photographer) that photography would be my big spend. Can’t wait to hear more! It’s such a fun thing to be involved in family/friends’ weddings but if it’s not organized, or expectations are out of reach, it gives the day a negative feel that it should’nt have. 🙁
I’d just like to say amen to everything. 🙂 Choosing a splurge, organization being next to godliness, keeping expectations within reach… all of it. I can tell you’ve had a few memorable experiences. 😀
Elope all the way. =) Don’t read this, mom.
😀
I’m looking forward to the rest of this series! I’ve been involved in weddings/florals for the past several years and have been debating whether it is really worth it for me. What tends to stress me out is worrying that the bride won’t be happy with the florals, since we’re working with a real, live, growing product that does not always arrive in the exact color/size as the Pinterest photo. 🙂
Real flowers sometimes look nothing like their Pinterest versions! Such a good point, especially when you had orders to make something look exactly like a highly edited photo. 😀 Good times.
Oh my i love your style of writing! Witty and funny! We did not have a lot of money to spend on flowers for our wedding and so we picked a lot of Queen Anne’s Lace and my florist did an amazing job of arranging them! They were whimsical and elegant! We also did order some flowers but the Queen Anne’s Lace helped so much in cutting the cost big time.
I love your creative solutions to a small budget. We think Queen Anne’s lace is the bomb.
My best wedding tip is to have lots of sisters. Delegate the details to them. That is where my wedding stress came from- not having any sisters, those angels is disguise who know you well enough to share all the squeals of delight and step in when you dissolve into blank stares of panic. (Not that the track record is any better in my household now.) 😀
😀 You make a good point, and one that I take for granted too often. Sisters help alleviate wedding stress, but there are probably cases where they also add significantly to it. 😀 Kris has already said if she’d get married she’d let us just plan the whole thing. A dangerous proposition.
I knew nothing about flowers when I got married but being a fall wedding I went with mums of all things. Kinda makes me giggle now, but my florist did a good job and I have no regrets. Fun series to read. You are hilarious!
Your wedding was timeless and beautiful. I don’t think you should change a thing about it. Mums for a fall wedding are perfect in my book (at least if they are the right kind). 🙂
I am so with you in having been involved in coordinating so many weddings and all the frustrations and stress that can be involved but when I hear the bride’s comment ” this is so beautiful, I love it”. It is reward enough for me. I am not with you on the eloping side of it :). My point is, keeping it simple and organized is the key. I enjoyed every minute of our wedding day. It was a stress-free day for me and loved it so much, I have told my husband I would love to do it all over again, he’s not on board with me there 🙂 the only thing I would change is the flowers :). Root Design Co. would be doing them again and adding that airy whimsical look. Absolutely love your work!
You are a rare and patient soul, Ruth, which is why you have coordinated so many weddings. 🙂 Your last comments made me laugh.